Hand me a break

Walking along a brick road your coat's cloth and it's static brushes his, there's that rough sound of friction in the quietness of chatter—it's ignored, but not forgotten.

Moments later, it happens again. This time you both smile a little because you're nervous. Then, as the story goes, his arm flies around you or your hands both dangle separately in that cliff-hanging stomach-pit feeling sort of way until—at last—finger by finger they interlock with each other. Literally, handing each other a line.

It's not the knight and shining armor rescues that are truly heroic, it's the every day tiny moments when one person saves another.

It's a stepping stone in the non-drunk world of hooking up. (And it probably also applies to the drunk world of hooking up).

It's a cute minor connection that is often sadly looked over and taken for granted. But in the absence of daylight and company to share the darkness with—it's not sex that most people miss, it's affection.

*Picture pulled from here.

~ z.

What's the call?

There's something to be said for the good old fashioned phone call (Alexander Graham Bell is rolling over in his grave).



Yes, Facebook, texting, hell, even emails have made dating so much easier, or wait, is it more complicated? Or maybe some combination of both. That being said, ladies and gents don't be scared to pick up the phone and use it for it's intended purpose. I know it's scary, and I'm not even being 100% sarcastic. We are conditioned to think it's scary because recent technology forces us into a complex impersonal webbed world where hearing a human voice and having to react immediatly is more uncommon than its alternative.

If a guy continues to text me, I either pick up my phone and call or say, ok, I'll call you in a little bit. Enough already. Don't get me wrong, I love email and Facebook messages and text messages. They can be cute and flirty and easy, but hey, on the same token, you can do all that AND throw in a phone call.

I don't know what really got me started on this tangent, but I think I was looking at social sites -- like Twitter -- and just realizing, wow, we type more than we talk. Isn't that sort of a shame?

One of the key components to any relationship I am in is usually: are you good on the phone? Sounds silly, but it's important because most of any real relationship is spent in conversation.

Stay tuned, my friends and I have discussed another modern day dating phenomenon: The Texting Boy... more to come.

~ z.

*Picture pulled from flickr

The perfect date?

What defines the perfect date? The atmosphere, the mood, the setting... or the person?

Valentines Day just came and went and I chose to ignore it. Why? V-day is alright, I guess. It was my favorite holiday as a kid, I used to spend so much money buying my parents stuffed animals they didn't want because I was giving them a "valentine." For some reason in grade school I got sick, like stomach flu sick, for three years in a row (I think pre-K through 2nd grade) and I was SO angry I missed the cardboard box vday card exchange. Well, that was when I was 5...

But now, really, I think Valentine's Day is more of a gimmick. It's OK, and it can be cute, but I'd so much rather a guy be spontaneously romantic than to give me flowers on Valentine's Day. Show up at my house on a random Tuesday armed with something small and cute -- and well, you've won me. Show up on a random Wednesday with a smile and well, you've still won me.  I don't need a holiday. Romance can occur at anytime anywhere and who am I to demand something when Hallmark tells me I should? And why would I? Where's the fun in that anyway?

*** I'd so much rather have a completely "out of nowhere" kiss on V-Day (Victory Day) than a completely cliche kiss on V-Day (Valentine's Day)

Actually, I had a date right before V-Day and we basically chose to ignore the pink holiday's existence, and you know what, that makes it perfect. Why make a date awkward by forcing unnecessary situations caused by a simple calendar date?  

So back to the original question, and yes it does tie into V-Day, what makes the perfect date? It's not atmosphere or the mood or the setting and, I dare say, it might not always be the person. It's the answer to a few simple questions: Did you have fun? Did you smile and continue smiling after the date was over? And lastly, would you want to see that person again?

OK fine, this might not always define the perfect date, but I guarantee you any perfect date would answer "yes" to all of the above... so until I can tell you what the perfect date is, you might as well just have some faith in the above questions. Seems contradictory right, having faith in questions, but really that's what life is-- QuEsTiOnS. So we might as well find solace in questions, because tell me you have answers and I'll tell you that you know nothing.

Questions? 

Good night and good luck 

~ z.

*Picture pulled from here